Mild controversy erupted/bubbled at Pocono today as an errant hot dog wrapper flew onto the grill of leader Brad Keselowski's car, forcing him to slow down, which allowed Dale Earnhardt Jr. to easily go by for the lead and the win.
But whose hot dog wrapper WAS IT?!?
A preliminary investigation revealed the following suspects:
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| An early suspect, eliminated as he has been dead for over a decade |
--A Dale Jr. fan (ok, admittedly this doesn't narrow it down much)
--A drunk idiot from Central PA (ok, admittedly this doesn't narrow it down much)
--Joey Chestnut, there to celebrate Aric Almirola's sponsor, Nathan's Hot Dogs, the frankfurter with the bold flavor and old-fashioned satisfaction
--Sales rep from Redd's Apple Ale, to keep the tradition of bad luck going
--Danica Patrick, automatically added to keep blaming her for everything
--Someone on the TNT crew, on the TNT crew, on the TNT crew
--Chemtrails left by black UN helicopters under the supervision of the illuminati reverse-vampires
--Brad Keselowski, in order to provide motivation to win next week
We'll pour over the evidence tonight, as well as the two-dozen suspects Jeff Gordon named who apparently ruined HIS day as well.