Speed Racer Rumored for Hendrick 48 Ride


As Nascar’s annual “Silly Season” rumor mill continues to swirl, a new candidate has surfaced as a favorite for the prized Hendrick Motorsports 48 car being vacated by Jimmie Johnson: sports car racer Speed Racer.

Speed Racer

“We’re looking at all our options for 2021”, team owner Rick Hendrick said earlier this week as the rumor picked up steam on Twitter, “and that includes looking at all possibilities.  It could be a driver let go from another major team for sponsorship concerns, a driver who lost his ride for making an idiot of himself online, or even a young hotshot from outside the sport.  Heck—wouldn’t be the first time.”

Racer has long competed for his family owned team, piloting the famed Mach 5 in a number of major “point-to-point” contests around the globe.  When contacted about the Nascar rumors at an event in the Sahara Desert, Racer was his typical indecipherable self.

Speed's
mysterious
driving coach
“To race in Nascar would be a definite honor ahhh”, Racer said in a fast, staccato speech pattern.  “However to do so I would have to leave my family team and that would possibly be very bad for everyone ahhh.”

Racer’s career has largely been steered by his parents and team owners, the bizarrely named “Mom” and “Pops”.  When reached for comment Pops was livid at the possibly of his son leaving the family team.

“You get out of here with those rumors!” Pops said while stomping on each foot.  “I will not hesitate to thrash you if you try to ask me about that again!”

The move would increase HMS’s current dominance on road courses, with Racer joining road racing ace Chase Elliott.  No, seriously—Chase Elliott.

“Having another driver who can turn both left and right would be a real boon for our team”, Elliott said, while emphasizing that he had no knowledge of any impending decision on the driver of the 48 car.  “Who knows who it could be, but whoever gets the ride better realize that you can’t race with a kid and a monkey in the trunk—well, unless you’re Tim Flock.”

While nothing has been confirmed as of this writing, rumors believed to originate from the Racer camp have stated that negotiations are centering around a buyout of the Racer race team, allowing Speed Racer to choose his own crew chief, and figuring out how to position a spotter in Trixie’s helicopter.