
“Let’s go away!”, the venerable arcade candidate stated at the press conference, indicating a movement away from the current political climate. The assembled crowd roared in approval.
When asked about the current hot-button issue of student loan debt forgiveness, the two-seater unit gave a definitive answer of “Time extension!”, showing a willingness to allow for repayments to be made over a longer period of time.
While pundits have labeled the Beginner’s chances as a long shot, some supporters are already considering its campaign Advanced with an Expert insight into what voters really want.
“Candidates always tell us what they think we want to hear”, a supporter said at the announcement. “They expect US to ask the questions—but Daytona USA, it asked ME if I wanted a Manual or Automatic Transmission of the campaign message.”
Little is known about the campaign itself, although the unit is reported getting advice from a mysterious “crew chief” who’s encouraged it to “hang in there!”