Fans across the nation took to message boards and chat room to voice their opinions tonight, and the feeling was nearly unanimous: the thoroughly unexciting, less-than popular results were fixed by Nascar.
"Oh come on, Nascar rigs all the races so Jimmie Johnson wins!", typed Jesse Clayton of El Paso, Texas. "You've seen how the ratings are skyrocketing after every dull, dominating win by the 48 crew! Brian France just wants his family business to succeed through lowered market valuations!"
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| Fox's statisticians, hard at work |
"This happens every week now--Nascar lets the 48 crew get away with everything so they can win", said Steve Gallagher of Hopkins, Minnesota. "I mean, Fox SAID that Jimmie should've pitted in 11th position! And last time I checked, I'm not going to believe a major sanctioning body over a company owned by Rupert Murdoch!"
Polls have shown that nearly 80% of fans believe that Nascar has done its best to ensure that drivers with little-to-no public persona win as much as possible, while keeping those with broad fan bases to no more than one win per four years. There also seems to be a consensus that people talk way too much about driver Danica Patrick.
"When I'm on the message boards, all I do is talk about how everybody focuses too much on Danica", said longtime fan Joel Nelson of Flemington, New Jersey. "When I'm on sports radio, I complain about everyone talking too much about Danica. I make sure that EVERYONE knows that all I hear about all the time is Danica Danica Danica! Why won't everybody shut up about Danica?!?"
The fans agreed that they plan to spend the week complaining about Rockingham no longer being on the Cup schedule, Johanna Long not having a competitive ride, and Dodge no longer being in the sport. There was also agreement to brag about Ed Carpenter winning the pole at Indianapolis despite having little resources beyond his millionaire track-owner step-father.
"I thought the race was boring, but then again, most All-Star sporting events are", said Jimmie Johnson of El Cajon, California. "I mean, I know that the 48 crew is difficult to like, but at least we don't talk about Danica all the time."