Though we're beyond the Golden, Silver, and Bronze Ages of Die-cast Collectable Cars (I think we're in the Tin Age now), people still love to see special paint schemes. And with today's easily-removable wraps and what-not, its easier than ever to make them. If any Nascar team marketers are reading this (and I know you're not), lets get moving on the following:
1. Gumby --I was SHOCKED that nobody has ever run a car commemorating our nation's greatest claymation creation. And no, Art Cloaky's OTHER creation, Davey and Goliath, haven't been emblazoned on a car either (not that ESPN would cover it). Recommended driver: AJ Allmendinger, who might be able to pull off the "Gumby" haircut.
2. "Manos": The Hands of Fate --Best-known for being one of the worst films ever made, its being re-released later this year on Blu-Ray from an original 35mm print. The fact that I know this without looking it up shows you that A) I'm a huge Mystery Science Theater 3000 fan, and B) I don't have a lot of friends. Recommended driver: Matt Kenseth, who can do both the mustache of The Master AND his dull, monotone voice.
3. Pink Floyd --Specifically the iconic Dark Side of the Moon album cover, which combines a prismatic triangle and a rainbow of light. So, in other words, people will think whoever drivers it is gay. Recommended driver: Kurt Busch, who knows what its like to be a sulky, bitter multi-millionaire.
4. Google --Now that Ask.com has faded away, its time for Google to--wait a minute, Ask is still around? Ask, as in, Ask Jeeves? Really? Wow. Recommended driver: Whoever won't spill the beans about Google's Phase III Overload Project, Launching May 2013.