The Race Team Alliance (RTA)—a coalition of Nascar Cup team owners—went public this week with its list of complaints about the way Nascar is being run. While Nascar came out with a tepid response (basically “continue the Charter system and we’ll talk”), the RTA is still fightin’ mad about what it sees as a non-sustainable business model. Here’s a list of some of the demands the RTA wants in the future:
—A guarantee in writing, both notarized and witnessed by several clergymen, that Brian France will not be allowed anywhere near the decision-making process.
—A redistribution of TV revenue to “That’s a heck of a lot of money going to Nascar” instead of the current model of “How the heck did anyone ever agree to this in the first place?”
—A public repository of driver salaries, so fans will stop bugging everyone with “hOw MuCh Do DrIvErS gEt PaId?”
—Consideration given to holding races in such exotic locales as Newton Iowa and Birmingham Alabama.
—An exploratory committee to look at the possibility of the feasibility of maybe—in the distant future—shortening Cup races.
—Giving of the charade of “discussions with a fourth manufacturer” when we all know its just a secretary calling the VW general information hotline and hanging up.
—Charging teams for damage if they have a driver who constantly wrecks other cars, like a certain team that employs a driver whose name rhymes with Dicky Renmouse.
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