Spade Racing

Ranking Watkins Glen “…at The Glen” Race Names

A good chunk of the Nascar Cup races held at Watkins Glen haven’t used numerical signifiers (400, 500, etc.), but instead have used the evocative “(sponsor) at/@ The Glen” format. Here’s a rundown of all of them, ranked from coolest to dullest:

1.) The Bud at The Glen (1994-98)—the inspiration for this listicle, one of the best names in Nascar history. It always sounded like a place to have a duel—“meet me tomorrow—high noon at The Bud…at the Glen.”

image courtesy Wikipedia

2.) Global Crossing @ The Glen (2000-01)—so grandiose, so retro-futuristic, so…early 00’s! The name could also work for a vague convention of management consultants.

3.) Frontier @ The Glen (1999)—just a year, but it evokes some sort of new beginning, like a race with quantum lap times or infinite tires.

4.) Budweiser at The Glen (1990-93)—slightly too formal for my tastes. Not to mention it can be phrased as a question. “Budweiser at the Glen?” “Sure—I’ll take two.”

5.) The Budweiser at The Glen (1986-89)—the first sponsor, and also the oddest-sounding iteration of Bud(wieser)’s sponsorship. It has a bit of a Nutty Professor vibe to it: “The Budweisereiserglaven at The Glen with the LAAADDDDYYYY!”

6.) Heluva Good! Sour Cream Dips at The Glen (2009-11)—sooo close to sounding cool, but they had to throw “Sour Cream Dips” in there. To be fair, most Watkins Glen races ARE Heluva Good to watch—thanks double-file restarts!

7.) Go Bowling at The Glen (2018-present)—I like bowling as much as the next guy, but this name always seemed like an odd fit. And while we’re at it, why not just call it the “Go Bowling 300”?

8.) Centurion Boats at The Glen (2007-08)—“you know what goes great with a stock car race? Boats.”

9.) Sirius Satellite Radio at The Glen (2002-2005)—while “Sirius at The Glen” would’ve been nice, this name is just too damn long. How much you want to bet that someone making six figures spent weeks working on the name?

10.) AMD at The Glen (2006)—hot racing action! Derring-do by some of the world’s best drivers! Cars going up to 180mph mere inches from each other! And…computer processing chips?

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Does this track have lights?

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Watkins Glen Race Picks: Uncle Max vs. 13th Place

It’s an all-underdog weekend here from Uncle Max, and I’m not just saying that because I’m delirious from worrying about getting ready to set up holiday displays at work. It’s because my big underdog picks came through last weekend!

That’s right—my general distaste for Notre Dame paid off handsomely, with NIU winning and me winning BIG. Then this past Sunday I bucked tradition and picked the New England Patriots, who not only beat the spread but won outright!

Not that anyone is asking, but I always think that you should split up your winnings 40-40-20: 40% goes to your “general fund” (groceries, bills, rent, etc.), 40% goes towards your regular gambling fund, and 20% should go towards a nice little splurge on a luxury item or experience. So this weekend I’ll be using my precious few hours off to plan out my next vacation—hello, Atlantic City!

TRUCK SERIES (5 wins) off

Saturday XFINITY SERIES (4 wins) MISSION 200: PARKER RETZLAFF—this MISSION will be no LAFFing matter (sorry).

Sunday CUP SERIES GO BOWLING AT THE GLEN: 13th Place (2 win) Picks ROSS CHASTAIN. FAVORITE (2 wins): AJ ALLMENDINGER—ANY driver in a Kaulig car this year is an underdog. NEXT FAVORITE: MICHAEL MCDOWELL—Front Row knows how to pick and choose their battles. DARK HORSE: KYLE BUSCH—payback for losing to Marcos Ambrose all those years ago.