Kevin Harvick has a problem with…

"Why don't you have a car number with a 3 in it, Greg?
It makes no sense!!!"

The Cope Twins as Prince

--The Dillon Brothers

--The Cope Twins

--Ricky Rudd

--Greg Biffle

--Kyle Busch

--Joey Logano

--Anybody who asks him if he has hairplugs

--The doctor who overcharged him for his hairplugs

--Richard Childress

Nelson as the Apollo astronauts

--Mike Dillon

--People who need to be told who Mike Dillon is

--The band Nelson ("They look like the Cope Twins")

--Brad Teague

--People who need to be told who Brad Teague is

--Kevin Harvick ("Too whiny")

Exhausted Brett Bodine Wins at Martinsville for Pace Car Motorsports

More than 20 years after his first win, Nascar veteran Brett Bodine finally drove won again today, taking his Pace Car Motorsports Camaro into Victory Lane at Martinsville.

"I just…this was a tough one", a visibly fatigued Bodine said while slumped next to his car.  "You have to work hard for every win in this series…well, not my first one, but you get the point.  I felt like I was out there leading almost half the race…it was a real workout."

Bodine was barely able to talk post-race, overcome both by exhaustion and emotion.

"Remember Brett Bodine?  He's
back--in Pog-form!"

"Everybody…that helped…me get here…I can't help it!  I don't show much emotion.  This is winning for me", Bodine said while simultaneously crying and receiving intravenous fluids.  "Well, its literally like winning for me, because it is."

Pace Car Motorsports has been a stalwart in the sport, competing in virtually every race since Nascar began.  Wins, however have been few and far between.  In fact, the team had not been to Victory Lane since its dominating win in the 2008 Brickyard 400.

"This goes out to everyone who ever raced for this team, but especially Elmo Langley", Bodine said while pointing to the sky.  "Elmo, this is for you!  Because you're the reason I'm here today, AND the reason I won before!"

In addition to the win, Bodine also got the Most Laps Led bonus point, having been out front for seemingly the entire race.  Bodine, however, refused to consider Chase implications.

"Right now, everybody at Pace Car Motorsports, we're just gonna celebrate this one.", Bodine said.  "I gotta thank everyone who helped us out today--BK Racing, Carl Edwards, and all the rest of the field for putting so much debris out there."

In other news, runner-up Jeff Gordon was so infuriated by the loss that he parked his car on the start-finish line, refusing to move.

Martinsville "News" and Notes

--After a week of playing "Talladega Roulette", we go to the tiny Martinsville Speedway, which is more like a game of Blackjack--there's a strategy, there's ways to put yourself in a better position to win, but its still really something of a crapshoot.

Corey beats the "Cheeks" car

--Developmental driver Corey LaJoie was reprimanded for making insensitive comments about a turban-wearing fellow at an airport.  Seems that Corey thinks that anyone who looks somewhat-Muslim should be automatically cavity-searched.  Um, I'd be careful what you wish for, Corey--you DO drive a car that looks like a taxi-cab.

--No word yet on what drug got Todd Parrot suspended (and then fired) from RPM, but I'm guessing its something that allows him to pretend its still 1998.

--In further still RPM news, Aric Almirola will run a #41 car this week to honor Hall of Fame inductee (and former driver of a #41 car) Maurice Petty.  Enjoy it while you can, folks--its the last time you'll be rooting for the driver of the 41 car for a long, long time.

--Denny Hamlin will be running a Jordan Brand "Jumpman" logo on his KBM Truck Series Tundra this Saturday.  Its so nice to see Nascar taking advantage of Martinsville's proximity to DC by running a tribute to former Washington Wizard great Michael Jordan.