Thursday, October 16, 2014

The Milkapolypse Is Upon Us

We're all a little
worried about Jay
by Jay Brent, special for Spade Racing

Many years ago, before the dawn of the modern age, it was written in stone of a great ending coming.  This cataclysmic event would mean the end of life as we know it, the end of normalcy, the end of…everything.
The stone--this…stone of truth--was destroyed by the unwise ones, thinking that by crushing the message, they had crushed their fate.  However, it did not alter anything, as man's destiny can never be changed.
And so the truth was passed down from generation to generation, those entrusted with it doomed to a life of knowing how the world would one day end, unable to share warning with the world, lest be seen as a fool.  Last night, upon arriving in Talladega, Alabama, I, Jay Brent, while under the influence of the magical night sky and King Cobra, was shared this truth by an infield shaman known only as Chief.  And now, I must share this truth with you.
It was foretold that, on October 18, 2014 AD, a great many trucks would descend upon this Native American burial ground.  However, one of them would be piloted by a Venezuelan, a woman with ample sponsorship and multiple college degrees.
This would would bring about chaos, disaster, and the end of organized racing as we know it.
This Saturday, the truth, the fate, the end is upon us.
This Saturday is The Milkapolypse.