Sunday, October 1, 2017

18 Team Seeks to Reacquire Pit Crew Member Who Did Everything


Despite a stellar performance on-track to start the Nascar Playoffs, the Joe Gibbs Racing crew of Kyle Busch is still attempting to bring staffer Christina Printz back to the team, as apparently she was responsible for virtually every non-essential activity for the team. 
Leaked photo of Kyle's replacement crew
"When we made the decision to switch the 18 & 19 teams' pit crews, we knew there would be some hiccups", said team owner and scab enthusiast Joe Gibbs. "What we've found, however, is that Christina was really the lynchpin to keeping the 18 team running like a well-oiled machine."
Printz, who was not made available for comment, apparently held such diverse responsibilities as relaying pit road speeds to crew chief Adam Stevens, making sure the 18 team's air guns operated at a higher pitch than everyone else's, and making sure that Kyle Busch got his water bottle to suck on after every race. 
"You don't really know what you're missing until it's gone, and that's what we're missing with Christina being reassigned to the 19 team", Busch said. "Heck--normally she'd be the one letting me know the media wanted to talk to me and I'd have been able to avoid this interview."
Printz is said to be rapidly turning the 19 crew around, specifically by keeping NBC Sports producers away from driver Daniel Suarez.