Sunday, August 7, 2016

Brad Keselowski Ruins Life by Pissing Off Guy from New Jersey


The face of anger
The Nascar world and the greater society at large sent out its condolences to Brad Keselowski shortly after the finish of the Cheez It 355 at The Glen, after Keselowski made the mistake of a lifetime by pissing-off a guy from New Jersey, Martin Truex Jr.
“Oh, boy, he’s done it now”, a random fan was heard saying upon seeing Keselowski dump Truex in the final turn at Watkins Glen.  “I mean, Keselowski has that way about him, and he’s ticked off plenty of people in Nascar before, but never anybody from New Jersey.  Oh boy, this is gonna be bad for Brad, that’s for sure.”
Truex appeared to take the moral high road by happily listening to Keselowski post-race, but that only made people more-frightful for the future.
“Oh no, he’s smiling?  That means he’s just planning something REALLY bad”, another fan was overheard saying idly as they watched the post-race “confrontation” on tv.  “Brad, what are you doing?  This isn’t Denny Hamlin or Jeff Gordon—Truex is from JERSEY!”
Though Truex claimed in the post-race interview that he had already cleared the air with Keselowski, most experts on the Garden State knew that this isn’t over—it’s just beginning.

“He told me it was his fault, and I told him I agreed with that”, Truex said while smiling a malevolent, vengeful smile.  He was later heard to remark that maybe Keselowski had his steering impaired by the gigantic chip on his shoulder.