Indiana State Police Trooper: "OK, license and registration, please?………Hmmm…Anthony Stewart…do you have any idea how fast you were going?"
Tony Stewart: "Um, it was kinda hard to tell, I just finished running the race over at the Speedway".
Trooper: "Yeah, sure you were…*SNIFF SNIFF*…hmmm, you been drinkin' today, Mr. Stewart?"
Stewart: "No, that's just stale champagne from victory lane."
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| "Staring contest, Danica, until you finish better than David Gilliland" |
Trooper: "Oh REALLY? So you won today and left the track right away?"
Stewart: "Oh I wish. Truth is my guy Ryan Newman won, I co-own his team."
Trooper: "Yeah, right…what are the chances of a lame-duck driver winning?"
Stewart: "No, seriously, Ryan won today--he won from the pole, even!"
Trooper: "Wait a minute--isn't Newman the guy you're firing at the end of the season?"
Stewart: "Um, yeah, unfortunately we need the ride for Kevin Harvick."
Trooper: "But don't you have a THIRD team, Mr. Stewart?"
Stewart: "Um…yeah. We do."
Trooper: "And where did THAT car finish today?"
Stewart: "…….thirtieth."
Trooper: "So let me get this straight--you have a driver who won today, won one of the biggest races of the year, and you're getting rid of him and keeping someone who finished THIRTIETH?!?"
Stewart: "Yeah, kinda weird how that worked out, huh?"
Trooper: "Um, Mr. Stewart--are you SURE you haven't been drinking?"