Saturday, August 18, 2018

Kasey Kahne: Milking a Career for All Its Worth


Kasey Khane is the latest Nascar Cup driver to announce an imminent end to his full-time racing career.  By looking back at his highlights, its easy to see he’s a true legend, dairy say one of the all-time greats.

2003—Kasey Kahne defects from Ford to Dodge, joining Evernham Motorsports in the Cup Series.  Estimates of how much money Kasey had to pay Ford vary, with anywhere from 1-2% of his whole net worth going to the blue oval.
Never forget... (...that Kasey made millions
doing something he loves, and I'm some
schmuck from Delaware)

2005—After several close calls, Kahne finally squeezes out a win at Richmond.

2006—Kahne establishes himself as one of the breast drivers in Nascar with six Cup Series wins.

2008—Kasey picks up Budweiser as a sponsor.  This is as good a time as any to remind any pregnant or nursing mothers to stay away from alcoholic beverages.

2011—Kahne posts an udderly surprising win at Phoenix for the soon-to-close-down Red Bull Racing Team.

2012—After having moved to Hendrick Motorsports, Kahne posts his third win in the Mother of all races, nursing his car through 600 grueling miles.

2016—Kahne fails to lead a single lap, much less win a race, in a season he’d most-likely choose to skim over.

2017—Kasey scores a massive upset win at the Brickyard 400, something something winner of the 500 drinks milk something something.