RATING: 8 victory lane pictures out of 10
a MOXOC Media Production
Spade Racing Opens Classic “Blaster Boxes” and Premiere Sets
Musically Declined: NASCAR Goes Country, When the Saints Go Marching In
Stock Car Racing and Country Music—two pillars of culture in the Southern United States. And the two have mingled throughout the years. So put on your racing shoes, make sure they match your cowboy hat, and settle in for a look back at some of Nascar’s biggest stars turned Nashville wannabes!
The Song: When the Saints Go Marching in, traditional
The Stars: Richard Petty, David Pearson, Cale Yarborough, Bobby Allison, Buddy Baker, Darrell Waltrip
The Clip:
The Review: Another “Six on a Song” public domain offering. The Jordanaires again shine through, but let’s take a moment to appreciate the great musicians on this album. Its kind of like getting a race car built and tuned by Hendrick Motorsports, pitted by a top crew from Joe Gibbs Racing, then letting ME race it.
The Verdict: Decent, mostly because you can’t really hear the drivers.
Spade Racing: The Tenth Anniversary!
Ten years ago I published my first article here on this website, and a decade later, here we are! Through relationships and breakups, moves and job changes, good times, bad times, and even a pandemic, this website has stayed strong. And from the bottom of my heart, I thank all of you who’ve been on this journey with me. If my writing has amused, enlightened, or even just distracted you for a few minutes a day, it makes it all worthwhile.
Here’s some highlights:
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| The 2022 Paint Scheme (click to enlarge) |
www.spaderacing.com updated four times weekly
A MOXOC Media production
UNCLE MAX vs. REPEAT WINNERS vs. THE ROULETTE WHEEL: Circuit of the Americas
March Madness bracket busted? Yeah—join the club.
Its been a disaster for me in all my pools this year—Saint Peters really did me in. Thankfully I don’t NEED the money that comes with winning, but I sure could do with it.
That’s because my ol’ not-so-reliable car is in the process of biting the dust. I’ll be prepping to go shopping for a reasonably-priced used car next weekend, so wish me luck.
Saturday Early Afternoon TRUCK SERIES Xpel 225: Kyle Busch—the KBM domination continues.
Saturday Late Afternoon XFINITY SERIES Pit Boss 250: Cole Custer—I mean if he can’t win in Cup, might as well dominate Xfinity.
Sunday CUP SERIES EchoPark GP of Texas: LAST RACE’S WINNER picks William Byron. THE ROULETTE WHEEL picks 22nd in points Justin Haley. FAVORITE (1 win): Chase Elliott—yeah, its obvious, but I don’t care. NEXT FAVORITE (1 win): AJ Allmendinger—hopefully he won’t fold under the pressure. DARK HORSE: Kurt Busch—he’s shown some speed lately…
www.spaderacing.com updated four times weekly
A MOXOC Media production
Spade Racing Opens Classic “Blaster Boxes” and Premiere Sets
RATING: 8 checkered flags out of 10
SPAD3 RACING LOOKING FOR PIT CREW MEMBERS
Are you looking for a change in careers?
Are you considering the exciting world of stock car racing as an option?
Are you able to decipher a coded message in under 20 seconds?
Then you might be the next pit crew member of Special Protective Advance Defense Department Detachment (SPAD3) Racing!
We’re looking for athletic goal-oriented people to join our new race team as pit crew members. A majority of the work is done Wednesday through Sunday with occasional extra work due to rain delays and anti-insurgent training. Full health benefits, 401k, group legal and “Vengeance Clause” available after 60 days.
The ideal candidate will have 3-5 years experience on a NASCAR pit crew or commiserate experience in another racing series. Must be willing to travel frequently with the possibility of long hours during the Playoffs. Must be able to pass a drug test and have Level-9 security clearance. Non-smoker preferred.
To apply, CLICK HERE.
SPAD3 Racing is an equal-opportunity employer
The Hero Card Project Part 1
Click Here for more info (the Preview)
The first batch of Hero Cards have arrived! With it being so early in the year, a few are left over from 2021--very understandable. Here's what's come in through March 18th:
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| Once again the pole winner is the Wood Bros. Race Team! |
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| HRE (the race team, not the German confederation) with three nice cards |
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| BJ McLeod's cards from his Xfinity and Cup teams |
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| MHR's two very nice cards (one autographed by Colby Howard) |
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| A few autographed cards from Niece (including the oddly named Lawless Alan) |
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| JTG-D with an autographed card from last year |
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| The small Big Machine Racing team sent an autographed card |
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| Matty D autographed his new card for his new team, RackleyWAR |
www.spaderacing.com updated four times weekly
A MOXOC Media production
UNCLE MAX vs. REPEAT WINNERS vs. THE ROULETTE WHEEL: Atlanta
Wow—the NextGen car has REALLY been a game-changer so far for Nascar Cup. I mean, we’ve had two first-time winners, super-exciting racing, and plenty of on-track passing. But, of course, as is always the case in sports, we also have the nay-sayers. I’m not talking about those who are waiting to see how the season shakes out to form an opinion—I’m talking about those who crap all over Nascar no matter what they do.
And its not just Nascar—its all over sports!
These are the kinds of people who complain about baseball being too long but whine about the implementation of a pitch clock.
These are the kinds of people who pine for “smash mouth football” but turn off a game that’s 9-7 in the third quarter.
These are the kinds of people who bash basketball players for playing dirty while also bashing refs for calling too many fouls.
To all of them I say “STOP COMPLAINING!” Yeesh—if I wanted to hear people complain about things I have no control over, I’d work the customer service desk at work.
Saturday Afternoon TRUCK SERIES FR8 208: Chandler Smith—just imagine if someone runs out of fuel between the 200 and 208 mile mark.
Saturday Evening XFINITY SERIES Nalley Cars 250: Trevor Bayne—hmm, I sense a pattern developing.
Sunday CUP SERIES Folds of Honor QT 500: LAST RACE’S WINNER picks Chase Briscoe. THE ROULETTE WHEEL picks 2nd in points Kyle Busch. FAVORITE (1 win): Ryan Blaney—let’s watch the Penske cars come alive! NEXT FAVORITE (1 win): Kyle Larson—let’s watch the Hendrick cars stay alive! DARK HORSE: Brad Keslowski—lets watch the RFK cars come back from the dead!
www.spaderacing.com updated four times weekly
A MOXOC Media production
Spade Racing Opens Classic “Blaster Boxes” and Premiere Sets
RATING: 9 Nascar officials out of 10
Musically Declined: NASCAR Goes Country, Butterbeans
Stock Car Racing and Country Music—two pillars of culture in the Southern United States. And the two have mingled throughout the years. So put on your racing shoes, make sure they match your cowboy hat, and settle in for a look back at some of Nascar’s biggest stars turned Nashville wannabes!
The Song: Butterbeans by unknown
The Star: Buddy Baker
The Clip:
The Review: In Nascar RaceHub’s fantastic look back at this album the four surviving driver/singers all agreed that Buddy was the only one with any talent. I would have to agree with them after listening to this light-hearted food song. I could totally see Buddy as an opening act for an opening act at a state fair. And he sings the word “pregnant”—scandalous!
The Verdict: The best of the rest—yes, faint praise, but still!
Danica Patrick’s Voice Being Investigated as Sleep Inducer
Coming off her appearance in the Fox broadcast booth last week, the medical industry is investigating the use of Danica Patrick’s voice for inducing sleep in those suffering from insomnia.
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| Commentary as exciting as doing your taxes (with a metal bottle of soda in your hand) |
“We’ve found that there’s many ways to lull a person to sleep—drugs, therapy, professional golf—but nothing seems to work quite as well as the droning monotone commentary of Danica Patrick”, said Dr. Emily Heston, an expert on sleep studies. “By harnessing her opinions on Nascar, delivered with all the intensity of Steven Wright, we might be able to make a major breakthrough for those who haven’t responded to traditional methods.”
Studies began last weekend, but are continuing this weekend with Danica’s return broadcast from Phoenix.
“Last week we happened to have the race replay on in the background, and we were amazed at how quickly some of our most-difficult patients drifted off to sleep”, Dr. Heston said. “Once they got past Clint Bowyer’s inane banter, they were able to let Danica Patrick’s dull insights overpower their desires to stay awake.”
Dr. Heston also said that they hope to use Patrick’s forthcoming broadcast excursions in IndyCar and Formula 1 to further the research.
“We’re looking forward to seeing what commenting on a three-hour-long pre-race from Indianapolis can do for our toughest patients”, Dr. Heston said. “We might also have some use for her F1 broadcasts, although some patients might be kept awake wondering how someone who never raced Formula 1 is commenting on Formula 1.”
Reportedly a team of scientists is also working on turning Jeff Burton’s high-pitched screaming into an effective alarm clock.
www.spaderacing.com updated four times weekly
A MOXOC Media production
UNCLE MAX vs. REPEAT WINNERS vs. THE ROULETTE WHEEL: Phoenix
Another win! As you’ll see below I picked Ross Chastain as my Dark Horse before he becomes too successful to be a dark horse anymore. For what its worth, I define a “Dark Horse” as any driver who hasn’t won yet this year (minus any fluke winners, aka The Front Row Motorsports Rule”) and isn’t in the Playoffs.
Speaking of The Melon Man, it looks like Trackhouse might have been the mid-level team to figure things out with the new car. Pretty impressive for a year-old team which just combined with a consistently mid-pack team to run up front. And its not just Chastain—Daniel Suarez is running great too! It goes to show that with some hard work, the right drivers, and a little luck, a two-car satellite team can succeed in Nascar. And by “succeed” I mean “do better than 23XI”.
TRUCK SERIES: off
Saturday Afternoon XFINITY SERIES United Rentals 200: Justin Allgaier—let’s hope this isn’t a repeat of my Xfinity Series picks from LAST year.
Sunday CUP SERIES Ruoff Mortgage 500k: LAST RACE’S WINNER picks Alex Bowman. THE ROULETTE WHEEL picks 4th in points Austin Cindric. FAVORITE (1 win): Martin Truex Jr.—looked strong last week. Lets see if he can avoid a flat tire. NEXT FAVORITE (1 win): Kyle Busch—looked strong last week. Lets see if he can avoid a flat tire. DARK HORSE: Ross Chastain—looked strong last wee—ah, you get the idea.
www.spaderacing.com updated four times weekly
A MOXOC Media production
Spade Racing Opens Classic “Blaster Boxes” and Premiere Sets
Recently I acquired a collection of Nascar cards from the past thirty years. Most of it was unopened “Blaster Boxes” (those things you see near checkout at big box stores) as well as a few early-90’s “Premiere Sets”. Lets open them and see what’s inside!
RATING: 1 overtime lap out of 10
SPAD3 RACING HIRES VETERAN CREW CHIEF
Special Protective Advance Defense Department Detachment (SPAD3) Racing, NASCAR Cup’s newest team, has announced that longtime crew chief Mike Henshaw will be atop the pit box for the 2022 season.
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| Crew Chief Mike Henshaw |
Henshaw said that he accepted the position based on the amount of backing the team has received.
“Quick story—I was interviewed for the position at the team owner’s office in Washington DC, and I was stunned at how many people are involved in making this thing work”, Henshaw said. “Of course none of them were able to tell me their names, but you don’t just happen to have dozens of guys and women in suits in your office unless you have some big plans.”
Henshaw said he anticipates SPAD3 Racing being competitive right from the outset.
“Look—I’ve been around (NASCAR) Cup racing long enough to know how tough it is”, Henshaw explained, “but I really feel like with the support we’re getting, combined with all the bells and whistles we’re expecting MOXOC (the team’s cybernetic driver) to have, we can really contend this year.”
Henshaw cautioned that the team’s race shop is not expected to be open to the public, due to what he said was “a gag order” implemented by the team’s backers.
Kyle Busch’s In-Car Camera Granted Playoff Waiver
After its serious injury in Sunday’s race at Auto Club Speedway, Nascar has granted a Cup Series Playoff waiver to Kyle Busch’s In-Car Camera.
“Because the injury to IC-CAM 2.18 occurred during the course of competition, said camera will be able to retain its chances for Playoff eligibility”, Nascar said in a prepared statement. “As long as IC-CAM 2.18 (better known as ‘Kyle Busch’s In-Car Camera’ is able to win a points-paying Cup race in the regular season, it can qualify for the Playoffs. And since in-car cameras don’t have to worry about flat tires, there’s a pretty good chance of that happening this year.”
Kyle Busch’s In-Car Camera had its lens shattered last Sunday, resulting in both a DNF (Did Not Focus) and a trip to a local medical/repair facility. Injuries are believed to be serious but not warranty-threatening.
“We’re looking forward to seeing Kyle Busch’s In-Car Camera back on the track as soon as possible”, said team owner Joe Gibbs. “IC-CAM 2.18 is expected to be cleared to race in 4-6 weeks, but the competitor that it is, we’re expecting to see it back at the shop as soon as its able. Its just like when I was coaching the Washington…whatever the heck they’re called now—competitors compete.”
Kyle Busch’s In-Car Camera released a statement shortly after Nascar’s, registering its satisfaction with the ruling.
“To all my fans, I’m glad to receive so many Get Well Soon texts, letters, and DM’s—its really meant a lot to me”, said IC-CAM 2.18 from its repair bench. “The doctors/techs are working ‘round the clock to get me functional and ready to race again. And to the rock that smashed my lens, just remember—Nascar said ‘Have at it, inanimate objects.’”
www.spaderacing.com updated four times weekly
A MOXOC Media production
UNCLE MAX vs. REPEAT WINNERS vs. THE ROULETTE WHEEL: Las Vegas
In the win column! OK, granted, picking Kyle Larson isn’t exactly rocket science, but hey—new car, new year, new leaders, right?
Speaking of which, I might be shopping for a gently-used, certified pre-owned car in the near future. My ol’ reliable isn’t all that reliable anymore—its never a good sign when you start being recognized by tow truck drivers. Oh well—it’ll be nice to have a car that has four working windows, doesn’t buzz loudly when you lock it, and won’t have that weird corn chips smell on really hot days.
Friday Night TRUCK SERIES Victoria’s Voice 200: Kyle Busch—lather, rinse, repeat.
Saturday Afternoon XFINITY SERIES Alsco 300: Daniel Hemric—can anyone sweep all the Alsco races?
Sunday CUP SERIES Pennzoil 400: LAST RACE’S WINNER picks Kyle Larson. THE ROULETTE WHEEL picks 3rd in points Martin Truex Jr. FAVORITE (1 win): Joey Logano—he couldn’t win at his sponsor’s track, maybe he can at his sponsor’s race. NEXT FAVORITE: Alex Bowman—fun fact: I called Denny’s pit road speeding penalty here last week. DARK HORSE: Tyler Reddick—ya gotta lose one to win one.
www.spaderacing.com updated four times weekly
A MOXOC Media production
Spade Racing Opens Classic “Blaster Boxes” and Premiere Sets
Recently I acquired a collection of Nascar cards from the past thirty years. Most of it was unopened “Blaster Boxes” (those things you see near checkout at big box stores) as well as a few early-90’s “Premiere Sets”. Lets open them and see what’s inside!
RATING: 4 spotters out of 10