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BREAKING NEWS: Carl Edwards Announces Run for Office


In an announcement speculated by racing and political pundits alike for years, Carl Edwards announced today on Twitter that he is, in fact, planning a run.

“Feeling cooped-up inside, gonna go for a three-mile run today”, Edwards tweeted out earlier this morning, confirming long-rumored plans of a run.

While some were disappointed in the nature of the run, Edwards soon after confirmed that he was, in fact, referring to a run for office.

“Gotta get some autographs sent out—they’re on the other side of the property in the office”, Edwards replied to a fan who asked about his motivations.

“Carl Edwards has been said to be contemplating a run for office for some time now”, said political analyst Clay Stevens.  “So getting the announcement this morning isn’t a big surprise.  After all, he’s always been devoted to physical fitness.”

Stevens also explained the possible ramifications of said run for office by the former Nascar star.

“Well, I have it on good authority that Carl’s office for his business affairs is at the top of a small hill”, Stevens said.  “So we can say with certainty that yes, Carl Edwards is, in fact, running for high office.

“Not only that”, Stevens continued, “but the office occasionally sees visitors—Carl’s friends and farm workers, for instance.  So it is, as many have speculated, a Public Office.”

Edwards’ Twitter feed understandably went dark for the rest of the morning, leaving fans in the dark as to details of the run for high public office, who would be assisting him (if anyone), and why the heck he retired from racing when he did.