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| The problem with working with Mark Martin |
Last night Danica Patrick was unable to race her way into tonight's Sprint All-Star Race. More-shockingly, she was unable to win the Sprint Fan Vote, with DogeCoin-supported driver Josh Wise garnering the most votes. With her first quasi-"Did Not Qualify" in her Nascar career, she's expected to spend her night as such:
7pm: Arrive at track, hoping that Josh Wise took her advice to "go out on top and retire".
7:05pm: Condolences from some of Nascar's elite, most of which can be summed up as, "At least your hauler doesn't keep getting stolen".
7:25pm: Ask Kurt Busch if anybody at Indy, you know, asked about her.
7:40pm: Kurt stops laughing.
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| "If there's one thing I remember from my racin' days, it's not qualifying." |
7:50pm: Dinner with Ricky Stenhouse Jr. at Hardee's.
8:25pm: Return to track; rejects offer to watch race from the Dave Blaney DNQ Suite.
8:30pm: Joins Nascar on Fox (Sports 1) broadcasting team for pre-race feature, "Girl Talk with Danica and Mikey".
8:55pm: Interview with Darrell Waltrip.
9:10pm: Files retraining order against Darrell Waltrip.
9:20pm: Wishes teammates good-luck.
9:25pm: Finishes apologizing to Tony Stewart for telling him to "break a leg out there".
9:30pm: Watches start of race from hauler.
9:35pm: Phone call.
9:35:05pm: Angrily hangs up after a caller sounding suspiciously like Kyle Petty asks her if "Mike R. Izzenfazt" is there.